I was jogging on a treadmill this morning when I suddenly watched a conversation in one of my favorite series: How I Met Your Mother. The episode in which Ted and Victoria decided to reunite. Victoria left her almost-husband Klaus before the wedding and surprisingly Klaus did the same thing. Thus, Ted asked Klaus what's wrong with Victoria that he left her? And here's the conversation:
July 10, 2016
There were times where I had a great intention to do something good, to make changes, to be beneficial for my surroundings, without any personal interest. And turned out, I got lots of things I wasn't even expecting at the beginning such as: experience, achievement, recognition, reputation, appreciation, and the list goes on. It was one of the best moment of my life and I was proud.
Proud. I realized now that "proud" is a dangerous word. If I may confess, being proud is enjoyable. I love the fact the people respected me for the things I had done.
I opened a new chapter of life as an employee. I still had a great intention to do something good, to make changes, and to be beneficial for my surroundings. The only difference was this time I was doing it with some personal interest. I wanted people to know I have a great quality. I wanted to be under the spotlight, at the center of attention. Wanting something like that isn't fully bad though, it pushes yourself to give your best in everything. But maybe I was over-wanting it, and that's where I needed to be stopped.
Long story short, without any luxury to choose, I was placed at this hidden temple. Being inside can be interpreted as "not being under the spotlight, not at the center of attention". Although I've tried my best, the hidden temple still can't be randomly seen. So I can't be seen either. It stressed me out.
After months (almost a year I guess) of contemplation and self introspection, and inspiring discussion with lots of great people, I finally realized that Allah was showing me a way to keep me right on track. If I wasn't placed at the hidden temple, I might have become an arrogant person which it can't be good.
They said life is an endless roller coaster ride and I do agree now. I was at the point where I was so confident facing life after achieving successes. I changed to be a bit self centered and believe it or not it affected my life a lot. I always knew that Allah will always give what's best for me including placing me in the hidden temple. But knowing that theory didn't instantly help me escape from the stress I had. It took almost a year of struggling with my own pride, to kill my own feelings, and to earn all the positivities back, until I was able to accept my condition.
Now that I've (hopefully) passed all the hard times, I can be more grateful to be inside my hidden temple. It made me learn to be okay not always being under the spotlight, at the center of attention. Luckily, the lesson inside this wonderful place made myself to be more humble. I'll keep learning and doing my best. Like I said earlier, life is an endless roller coaster ride, it goes down sometimes, but it will go up again eventually.
Anyway as an announcement (if there are still someone to be announced: the reader of this blog which I doubt would be that many lol), I'm getting more active in soundcloud, making some original songs. For anyone who cares enough to listen may click this link: https://soundcloud.com/bajoked enjoy!
(And thanks to my friend BS for editing all the above)
May 07, 2016
My second original song, "Dare To Be Different" available on this link: https://soundcloud.com/bajoked/dare-to-be-different
They stared at me with all their confused look
Their eyes said they don’t believe that I could
What if I’m right and turns out they’re all wrong
Can we all together and still get along
Oh baby I have this point of view
And I never tried to force you
Clearly we’re not at the same page
So let’s keep it down and move along
But I will prove to them in silence
That my faith is not just a sensation
I’ll show it to the world, not by saying words
But with a great big smile, I’m consistent
Our life is not that long to be frightened
So you might judge, instead I’ll do action
Oh darling yes I would, and surely yes I could
Because I dare to be different
Posted by Bajoked at 8:30 PM